The hardest part of grief often begins after the memorial service is over. The floral arrangements begin to fade, the extended family flies back to the mainland, and the daily routine sets back in. That is when the silence can become overwhelming. When the initial shock wears off, the quiet reality of the ache remains. Whether you lost a loved one recently or are carrying a heavy burden from years past, there is no expiration date on grief.
Fortunately, there are excellent, compassionate resources across Oahu designed to help you navigate this valley. Here is a guide to local support groups, community programs, and pastoral care options available to you.
1. GriefShare Programs
GriefShare is a 13-week, Christ-centered support group that meets weekly. I consistently recommend this as one of the most effective programs for processing loss. It places you alongside others who understand exactly what you are going through, removing the profound isolation that so often accompanies mourning.
- How it works: Each session includes a video seminar featuring respected Christian grief experts and counselors, followed by a small group discussion. It provides a safe, structured space to lament, ask hard questions, and find biblical comfort without feeling rushed to “get over it.”
- Where to find it: Several churches across Oahu—from Honolulu and Kapolei to the Windward side—host GriefShare groups throughout the year. You can visit GriefShare.org and enter your zip code to find the group meeting closest to you.
2. Local Hospice Bereavement Programs
There is a common misconception that you must have utilized a specific hospice provider’s medical services to benefit from their bereavement programs. In reality, several local organizations offer grief support to the wider community, often free of charge.
- Navian Hawaii (formerly Hospice Hawaii): Navian offers comprehensive grief support for the entire community. They host specialized support groups, including dedicated spaces for those who have lost a spouse or a child, as well as general grief workshops to help individuals process the practical and emotional hurdles of loss.
- Bristol Hospice Hawaii: Bristol provides ongoing bereavement support, memorial events, and educational resources designed to help families transition through the complex, layered emotions of losing a loved one.
3. Professional Christian Counseling
Sometimes, the dynamics of a group setting feel like too much, and you simply need one-on-one support. There is absolutely no shame in seeking professional help; in fact, utilizing therapy is a profound step of wisdom. Working with a licensed therapist can provide you with the specific, practical tools needed to process complex, prolonged, or traumatic grief.
- Local Networks: I highly recommend seeking out licensed Christian counselors on the island who can address both your clinical mental health and your spiritual needs. Organizations like the Hawaii Association of Christian Counselors can serve as an excellent starting point. Alternatively, you can search directories like Psychology Today, filtering specifically for Christian counselors in your area of Oahu.
4. Pastoral Care and Honest Faith
While professional counseling and community support groups are vital, there is also a deep need for direct pastoral care. Grief has a way of uprooting our deepest theological convictions. It is entirely normal to find yourself wrestling with hard questions about death, struggling with anger at God, or feeling spiritually numb.
God is not intimidated by your grief, your doubts, or your questions. He is the Savior who stood at the tomb of His friend Lazarus and wept. If you are struggling with the heavy spiritual questions of loss, or if you simply need someone to pray over you when you do not have the words to pray yourself, my door is open.
You Do Not Have to Walk This Road Alone
Grief is not a linear process to be rushed, nor is it a problem to be solved. It is the painful, ongoing journey of learning how to love someone who is no longer physically here. As you walk through these days, give yourself grace. Lean on the body of Christ, utilize the resources our local community offers, and anchor yourself to the promise of Psalm 34:18: “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”
Contact
If you need pastoral support today, or if you need help getting connected to one of the counselors or groups listed above, please do not hesitate to reach out.
Call for pastoral support: (808) 761-5939
